Tissue expander/ implant exchange surgery. Toughest post yet

So I unwrapped myself this morning around 1030, but I was all by myself so I called my sister Amy because I was nervous.  We face timed and she was with me while I took everything off.  Nerve-wracking?  Understatement.  They look good? Maybe? I think?  I’m not real sure how I feel about them yet.  I know it can take a few months for the implants to settle.  I am trying not to be too hard on myself, and keep in mind that they will look different in a few weeks. But I did it, I forced myself to unwrap them.  They look better than I thought they would, but I still just don’t know how I feel yet.  I felt like I was on the urge of a panic attack all day.  I got responses from “they look great! To they look ok.”  Thanks to Erin (one person who told me she thought they looked good) my sister-in-law who talked me through it. I started feeling very insecure and worried that I look deformed.  She listened to all of my worries and helped me so much.  Thank you Erin.  So, I will post pics of the results when I unwrapped today.  This is a very hard thing for me to show you because I don’t know how I feel about them.  But I told you when I started this that I would be as real as I can so I will post pics on my pictures page.

Nervous

Today is the day I am allowed to unwrap myself.  It’s also the first day throughout this process that I have been this nervous.  I was nervous one other time, when I was going to possibly get my drain out, but that doesn’t even hold a candle to how I am feeling right now.  I’m sitting here on the couch by myself contemplating if I should unwrap now or wait until Eric gets home.  I am literally sweating.  This entire experience ends (mostly) with this.  What if they look bad.  I know it takes a few weeks for them to settle, but I really want them to look nice. Who knows, maybe they will be fabulous.  I know it seems silly to be this nervous…but I just can’t seem to help myself.  I have physical therapy  on Wednesday, my dad is coming down to take me.  My next post op appointment isn’t until feb 21st.   Why do I have to be such a wimp.  I know I should just unwrap them and get it over with but I just don’t know if I want to do it while I am alone.  Pathetic, I know.